There is a fine line between being a clingy girlfriend and an affectionate girlfriend. All boyfriends want someone who cares for them like no other. What boyfriends don\u2019t like is someone who stalks their everyday life and does not even give them the space to breathe. Men loathe smothering girlfriends. In fact, clinginess in a relationship is a turn off for women too, right?<\/p>\n <\/p>\n But where does one draw the line? After all, it is difficult to find the right balance between clinginess and distance. The truth is that the extent of clinginess varies from relationship to relationship. What could be too clingy for one boyfriend could seem like lots of love and care for the other\u2026But there are some signs of a needy girlfriend that most men get put off by. We\u2019re here to help you decode those and learn how not to be clingy, in consultation with life coach Joie Bose<\/a>, who specializes in counseling people dealing with abusive marriages, breakups and extramarital affairs.<\/p>\n <\/span><\/p>\n \u201cWhat is a clingy person? Well, the meaning of \u2018clingy\u2019 is subjective and differs in definition from person to person. The moment you start saying that your partner is clingy, it means that there is something about this relationship that you don\u2019t like and you want it to change. It\u2019s often an indicator that one partner who finds the other clingy is not happy. It is also at times an indicator that the clingy partner is perhaps suspecting the other and has trust issues,\u201d says Joie.<\/p>\n So, if they you\u2019re a clingy lover, it\u2019s a good idea to reflect on your behavior patterns:<\/p>\n <\/span><\/p>\n Most emotionally needy women are not even aware of the negative effects of their actions and probably do not think they are doing anything wrong. It\u2019s as if their judgment and self-awareness are clouded with an influx of emotions and love hormones. They constantly feel the urge to either talk to their partner or meet up with them. Staying apart even for a few hours makes them insecure about the relationship, causing them to act out. These are all signs of clingy behavior.<\/p>\n Related Reading:<\/strong> Are You In A Clingy Relationship? Here Is How You Must Deal With It\u2026<\/a><\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n But what causes clinginess? If you keep wondering \u201cWhy am I so clingy to my boyfriend?\u201d, here are some possible underlying reasons:<\/p>\n Do you possess toxic girlfriend traits? Is being extra a bad thing? Most of all, how to stop being clingy and needy? If you\u2019re feeling overwhelmed with such questions, don\u2019t worry, this article will help you become the girlfriend who loves her alone time and doesn\u2019t need constant reassurance. Here are some characteristics of a pushy person, followed by tips on how to ask for attention without being needy:<\/p>\n <\/span><\/p>\n Even though it feels uncomfortable to accept your flaws, being self-aware is the first step to bringing change. So, here are some warning signs of a desperate woman:<\/p>\n <\/span><\/p>\n \u201cTo assess if you\u2019re being an overbearing girlfriend, pay attention to how your boyfriend reacts to your advances, plans and suggestions. For instance, when you make a plan, does he half-heartedly accept it for he fears your reactions and then spends all his time on his phone instead of focusing on you? It could be one of the signs you\u2019re clingy and he is feeling stifled in the relationship,\u201d says Joie.<\/p>\n Your connection with your boyfriend can improve markedly if you understand the importance of space in a relationship<\/a>. He will gradually let you enter that personal space he holds so sacred. Be patient enough to let it happen on its own. Don\u2019t push it.<\/p>\n <\/span><\/p>\n You reminisce the honeymoon phase<\/a> of your relationship where he couldn\u2019t keep his hands off. You would talk day and night and eagerly wait for the next time you meet. But now, you end up hugging your boyfriend while playing video games and he gives you a cold shoulder. Can you relate? Well, you\u2019re coming off way too pushy.<\/p>\n \u201cWhen there is constant pressure from your end to communicate and be in touch, he may switch off his phone and not be reachable sometimes. He will, of course, say it happened because his phone ran out of battery but there is a pattern to this. This is a sign that he needs his me time but can\u2019t tell you,\u201d says Joie.<\/p>\n Related Reading:<\/b> Why Is Space So Crucial In A Relationship?<\/a><\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n <\/span><\/p>\n After getting into a relationship, many people forget that they still have separate lives. A clingy girlfriend is the first one to forget that:<\/p>\n \u201cIf you feel you are unable to do things without him and constantly depend on him for things, it is definitely a sign that you depend on him too much. Even if he doesn\u2019t say it, you are being an overly attached girlfriend,\u201d says Joie. Adding to what she said, here are some insecure girlfriend signs:<\/p>\n <\/span><\/p>\n If you\u2019re still not sure whether you fit the characteristics of an emotionally needy person<\/a>, perhaps pay attention to how much of this relationship revolves around your needs, wants and desires. If you lean on your boyfriend for all your needs \u2013 no matter how big or trivial \u2013 and he has no option but to comply, you definitely need to figure out how not to be clingy.<\/p>\n Initially, your boyfriend might find your jealousy cute. He might even think it\u2019s a sign of love<\/a>. But constant attention-seeking will eventually frustrate him and he will want an out in the long run. Here are some classic signs of a possessive girlfriend:<\/p>\n <\/span><\/p>\n \u201cWhen your happiness and sadness depends on how much time he is giving you and spending with you, it is a clingy girlfriend sign and that is not good for you either. If you get irritated and sad when he chooses to spend time with others excluding you and begin to wonder how much your worth is in his life, then your relationship is not solid and constantly asking him about it will make him be bitter about you! This is NOT healthy,\u201d says Joie.<\/p>\n Related Reading:<\/strong> How Being Clingy Can Kill Your Relationship<\/a><\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n My friend Sarah confessed to me one day, \u201cIs being clingy a bad thing? I am constantly living in the fear that he\u2019s going to leave me. Why am I so clingy in the first place?\u201d When she told me this, I realized that feeling needy in a relationship can take a huge toll on one\u2019s mental health. Here are some signs of a woman with trust issues:<\/p>\n Even if deep down you know that his actions are not signs of a cheating partner<\/a>, you still cannot shake off your feelings of insecurity and the fear that your boyfriend will hurt you and break your heart. Constant suspicion is a big turn-off. It will only distance him even more as he begins to notice these clingy girlfriend signs in you and may even consider ending the relationship.<\/p>\n <\/span><\/p>\n It\u2019s a good thing to be crazy about him. But by constantly thinking about him and your relationship, you are leaving no room for your individual life. And it\u2019s very important to have a life that doesn\u2019t revolve around your boyfriend. In fact, all healthy relationships<\/a> maintain a balance between \u2018individual\u2019 life and \u2018love\u2019 life. So, make sure you don\u2019t ignore your friends and family while you are in a relationship.<\/p>\n Are you still looking for the meaning of clingy? Here\u2019s an example: Even when you are out shopping with your friends, you end up buying stuff (shirts, perfume, tie, watches) only for him. How to stop being a clingy girlfriend? You must make an active effort to be there for your friends and family and also invest more time in your professional career. Focus on exuding signs of a confident woman instead of being an overbearing girlfriend, it\u2019s the former that will make you more attractive to a man.<\/p>\n Related Reading:<\/b> 5 Things Men Do To Make A Woman Feel Insecure<\/a><\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n <\/span><\/p>\n You might be important in his life but you cannot constantly keep seeking validation about this. Your boyfriend will have things in his life that are as important to him as you are and this is completely normal. Trust is the foundation of a healthy relationship and if you don\u2019t trust him, then what are you fighting for? If he is looking stunning in a leather jacket compliment him, instead of thinking other women will be eyeing him.<\/p>\n It\u2019s vital to understand that these insecurities that you grapple with may have nothing to do with your boyfriend but you instead:<\/p>\n \u201cDo you keep sending clingy girlfriend texts because you\u2019re jealous of his friends and social life? To find the answer to this question, notice the way his friends behave around you. If his group of boys stop talking and begin acting all formal the moment you come in, it indicates that he behaves in a certain manner in front of you and differently with them.<\/p>\n \u201cAs you\u2019re a clingy girl and will perhaps enquire too much, he prefers to keep that from you,\u201d says Joie. On that note, here are some controlling girlfriend signs you should look out for:<\/p>\n <\/p>\n \u201cIs he dating a needy person who is jealous of his friends and social life? To find the answer to this question, notice the way his friends behave around you. If his group of boys stop talking and begin acting all formal the moment you come in, it indicates that he behaves in a certain manner in front of you and differently with them. As you\u2019re a clingy girl, who will perhaps enquire too much, he prefers to keep that from you,\u201d says Joie.<\/p>\n Related Reading:<\/strong> How To Deal With Jealousy In Relationships?<\/a><\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n So, you see how the signs you are begging for attention can be counterproductive. You cling to your boyfriend in the hopes of getting closer to him and making sure that he doesn\u2019t leave you, but in the process, you\u2019re only driving him away. You may not even know who he really is. How can you then hope to build a long, fulfilling relationship with him?<\/p>\n Every girlfriend is a bit possessive about her man but too much of it is the doom of a relationship. If you are being over-possessive, you need to learn to rein in your impulses and reactions. Stop being obsessed with your partner<\/a> by constantly reminding yourself that he is a part of your life and not your life itself. Needy women start treating their boyfriends like their property and no one else can even eye them. Here are some examples of clingy texts they send:<\/p>\n <\/span><\/span><\/span><\/span><\/p>\n How to know if you\u2019re clingy? A casual conversation between your boyfriend and a female friend makes you want to scratch the girl\u2019s eyes out. To set boundaries, you must be able to trust your partner and understand that at times he will interact with the opposite sex and even have close friends who are women. Irrational jealousy and possessiveness have no place in a healthy relationship.<\/p>\n One of the most telling signs of a toxic girlfriend<\/a> is that your boyfriend becomes the central and sole focus of your life. Your friends, family, even your career become secondary. So, if you\u2019re the kind who\u2019d ditch a friend at the last minute just because your boyfriend has time for a coffee date or blow off a work presentation because he suggested \u2018Netflix and chill\u2019, you\u2019ve blurred the lines between clingy vs affection.<\/p>\n Always being available for him will make him take you for granted. He will know that you will always make time for him and thus he will only make plans at his convenience and not be afraid to cancel on you at the last minute. Here\u2019s how you can set healthy boundaries and stop being clingy in a relationship:<\/p>\n My friend Paul confessed, \u201cMy girlfriend wants to talk all the time. Is there any solution to girlfriend always complaining?\u201d So, are you an understanding girlfriend or an insecure one? Ponder on the following questions:<\/p>\n There is constant doubt in your mind about his \u2018true\u2019 feelings. If you constantly feel this way and there have been instances to suggest that he pretends to love you<\/a>, it\u2019s time for open communication. However, if your paranoia is at the root of your toxic traits, you need to delve deeper into those suspicions and insecurities. Otherwise, the signs you need alone time will take a toll on your relationship, sooner or later.<\/p>\nNeedy Person Psychology<\/h3>\n
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15 Clingy Girlfriend Signs<\/h2>\n
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1. You do not give him space<\/h3>\n
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2. Wanting to talk to him all the time<\/h3>\n
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3. His entire life must revolve around you<\/h3>\n
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4. You are over-dependent on him<\/h3>\n
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5. All his attention should be on you<\/h3>\n
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6. You become suspicious<\/h3>\n
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7. You are constantly thinking about him<\/h3>\n
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8. Insecurity creeps in<\/h3>\n
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9. You are jealous that he has a life without you<\/h3>\n
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10. You are possessive<\/h3>\n
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11. You are too available<\/h3>\n
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12. A clingy girlfriend needs constant reassurance<\/h3>\n
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13. Low self-esteem<\/h3>\n